I'm depressed.
So, I live alone. Away from the cause of my sadness and depression. But it doesn't leave me, it doesn't stop because I love my mom. And there are consequences that I need to bear as a good daughter. Now holiday is approaching and I chose not to go back, so that I won't have to travel to two different places. But I haven't tell her yet. I don't have any good reasons to lie about. Or should I not lie at all?
"Mom, I'm not going back this holiday."
"Why?"
"I need to take a break from all of you."
Really? Wow, that's bold. I'm not that rebellious yet.
Sometimes, I wonder why God has not let me meet a good guy yet. Why? To let me settle my problem first? The thing is, my problem will never settle. Maybe I need a change in my life.
There is a change in my life recently. I started working at a new place. New environment, new breath of life. But I feel alone. I try not to, but I feel it. Even while working, I feel extremely alone. Very less supportive colleagues, and most of them being male. Very less people to refer to. No wonder everyone wanted to leave the school. But why don't they realise that they have the power to improve the working environment if they just play their own part? When everyone gives out their own effort, even just a bit, everything would get better.
Life just gets harder for me, as I get older.
